My first high risk OBGYN.

July 31, 2012

The days leading up to July 31, 2012 felt like months. Finally the day was here. Today didn't start off as a bad day. We actually walked into our first "High Risk" OBGYN office with high hopes. By this time I was now 17 weeks pregnant.  The high risk OBGYN and my doctor that performed my surgery had been keeping close contact and he had all the information on me he needed. I felt like I was about to get extra good care. Little did I know, I was walking into another set back.

Deeco and I played around in the office, being the usual, goofy/playful couple we are. We were amazed at how many girls were having twins in the waiting room. Also enjoying the twins running around the waiting room. Kids just bring so much joy, rather their yours or not :) When we were called back I lead the way as my Mother and Deeco followed behind. I was first taken into a room. The nurse came in did the usual, weight check, blood pressure, ect. After she was finished we were escorted to the ultrasound room. Comments were made during the day "What if we found out the sex today?",  but we didn't want to get our hopes up. 

Sure enough, I was going to find out the sex! I was so excited I could barely hold it in. I think usually women find out around 20 weeks. Since I was now high risk, ultrasounds were a weekly routine. I'll never forget the feeling that day or every second spent in that room. I laid back trying to sit still, My mom was in front of me, Deeco on the side holding my hand and a big TV screen in the view for all of us. Before I knew it, She said " IT'S A BOY". We all started crying right away. Deeco got his boy, and  now I'm following the same foot steps as my mom (Boy first, followed by two girls). That moment will forever be in my heart and the love we felt instantly was unexplainable. 

We were so over whelmed with joy! After we were done, we were then escorted back to the first room we were in. What do ya know, My mom pulls out stickers and a marker to take pictures of the sex to send to everyone in text. She always comes prepared :) My mom and I were set on a girl, So we didn't have a boy sticker haha, Nothing a little blue marker can't change :)

As we were all sending out mass text messages waiting on the doctor, a nurse walked in. She asked us to follow her to Dr. Stoessel's office. I started to feel that lump again in my throat. We all sat around the high risk doctor's desk. He shook our hands, we all introduced ourselves and so on. Immediately he pulled up all my medical imaging and operating reports on his computer and turned the screen to us. As he started to speak I felt my knees getting weak. 

As he went on explaining that the tumor is so large and because of where it is located, as the baby grew it would close my birth canal. He explained that the tumor was too much of a risk for me and I wouldn't survive if I went through with the pregnancy. He then looked at me, and said "What do you think about terminating?". I instantly broke out in tears. I sternly said "No, Absolutely NOT".  I was starting to get frantic. I looked at Deeco and my Mother. Both with emptiness in their eyes, waiting for them to jump on my side. The doctor proceeded to try and convince me, at this time I was paying him no mind and sticking to my guns. Deeco and my Mother calmed me, Stated remember "There is no baby without you Fallon." At the time I wasn't hearing it, Nothing was going to change my mind. We left right away. As I calmed down they explained that they backed me 100% no matter what, But that in reality there was no baby without me. They had a point, But later that night Deeco and I decided no matter what we were going thru with this, We were going to spend the next couple days finding someone that wanted to take on this challenge.  

The following day we sat and pulled out the ipads and phone book. Started calling all over, some said "Sorry we already heard about you" and some just called back with, "Sorry our doctor is not interested in taking something like this on." We were starting to get discouraged. Finally Deeco found a GI surgeon at the University of Miami Sylvester Cancer Institute by the name of Dr. Heidi Bahana. She was more than happy to meet with me. There was hope.... We waited with our fingers crossed & many prayers..... No matter what I wasn't going to give up, it wasn't even a question that crossed my mind once.

Needless to say, we never returned to that high risk doctors office again.

I thought my last post were hard to write until this one, I write this post with tons of hurt behind it. This was an extremely hard day for me, and the hurt we all felt just could never be put into words. I was finally blessed with my first child, but I was living a nightmare. Through my sad moments, Do know I lived the most amazing love filled moments of my life! This article shows, my happy to sad. This was repetitive the entire journey. But my good from my son will always out weigh any bad thats put in front of my face :)

I have a Medical Record book that I am trying to go thru currently. Here is my report on my visit with this high risk OBGYN. Note: (She is absolutely against) :)